Chapter 1 dont look directly at the sun

liar, what a fucking liar. fucking irritating cunt, that's what he is, a fucking lying cunt. Everyday he tells me that he'll be there at 3:00pm and always ends up getting here until 5:00pm. I desperately wait in front of the fence. By this time everybody has had gone home. I sit there looking at the sign in front of the school saying "Newport EL", my elementary school. fucking bullshit. i squint my eyes as i look up to the sun. People always say not to look directly at the sun or you'll go blind. I do it anyways, or at least i try to. what if theirs a secret they don't want us to know and that's why they don't want us to look at the sun. maybe you go blind because the secret is to powerful and took away your eyesight.

when i look at the sun i try to be careful and only glare it for a second, not giving me enough time to uncover the secrets of the sun. A car horns immensely loud and i am annoyed by it. "ANNA!", somebody shouts and i quickly look in the direction where i heard somebody yelling.

"STUD!" I shout while waving to him. "Hey, your father said that he Wont Be able to pick you up today because he has a business meeting in Palm Springs"! He screams in his British accent while I get up and put my Backpack on. I should have known, I think to myself as I run across theStreet to his car. "Get in!” stud says while unlocking the door. I runTo the other side of the car, open the door and get in. Stud was a drug dealer, my mom always said that, but always told me to Never tell anyone unless they meant business.I catched a glimpse of Stud looking at me through the rear view mirror."What the fuck are you all moosey-faced aboot?” stud says while lilting A cigarette."Noting" I say while staring at my dirty fingernails."Don't give me that bullshit, what the fuck is up? Is this aboot Louis?""I don't know" I stare at the kids riding bikes outside the car window."I know how you feel, my fucking dad was never there for me either, he Was just one sick cunt fucking every whore he could?"Stud wasn't like those other adults, he was one of those people that Won’t symphonize the situation your in, he'll just tell give you the Truth Straight up. Maybe that's what I liked about him, that he was honest And not a fucking liar like everyone else. Some people even thought Stud Was A nickname for his imposing appearance, he had women leading him on allThe time. Their was something about his green eyes, British accent, Slender body, greasy dark hair, matt Dillion face alike that drove them Crazy. Whenever I was around him I felt as if everybody around us was Looking at us.I crank up women by Def Leppard that is on kroq as a ringing sound Startles me. Its Studs car phone."Turn that fucking down", Stud says deliberately while reaching for the Phone."Who the fuck is this?" stud says annoyed while trying to drive and Talk On the phone on the same time."Oh hey, I have your daughter with me", I look at him instantly knowing He’s talking to mom."Shit I have company tonight; I will be peddling some merchandise""Alright, but it’s not my fault for all her childhood trauma.""Kay I got to bolt."He bleeps off the phone and sets it down."Your mom is hanging out with that cunt tonight so you’re staying with meToday""Again"! God I fucking hate that irritating bastard!""Sick cunt, eh?""Fuck chia""I don't want you fucking using that sick language in front of those cunts you call your parents""Who’s the company you have tonight?""Crackwhores""Oh otay or ay fucking boots?""Otay, those money grabbing bastards.""Ah."Stud pulls over to his driveway. I step out of the car and begin the Journey of my life.This was the first time I had ever visited Studs home.It looked old, untaken cared of, lonesome, reminded me of myself. The Lawn was dried up, and a large tree with leaves that looked crimson redAs if it was bleeding, Chipped blue paint of the wooden walls of the House, Bikes on the ground. I liked the imperfectness of the whole Thing. To me it looked so perfect with the sun hitting it so Beautifully."What the fuck are you waiting for, get in."Stud says as I stand their admiring the scenery.I walk in into the house.